2.02.2006

An Ode to Mr. Potential

Here's my Angela Basset ala Waiting to Exhale "It is trash" moment...Here's my ode to the smallest man I've ever met.
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I am tired of short men and their complexes of being with a taller woman.

Get over yourselves.

If a woman can look at you and find you attractive, smart, sexy, funny and worth her time don't you think you could just let if freaking go? Don't you think that perhaps that a woman doesn't really care if you rival her height, or that you don't for that matter? Do you think you could maybe try to get it? Try to understand that for as short as you are and as much as it bothers you, that the fantastic woman sitting across from you doesn't give a shit that you are not her equal when it comes to height.

Here's a clue:

Don't make jokes. Don't think its the first time we've ever heard them either. Don't think that if this girl had a dollar for every man who was shorter than her she wouldn't be rich. Don't contstantly ask if it bothers us that you are shorter than this fabulous chick who is with you. Don't make self-depriciating remarks about your stature. Just don't. It's annoying, it's tedious, and it makes you look like a total ass.

Just realize that it's you we like. We have our own vices, far too many of them, to worry about yours.

So here's to you, smallest of small, shortest of short Mr. Potential...Time to rid you from the noise. I hope you have fun sailing your boats and building your houses. I hope that another one of your "girls" isn't swayed into Starbucks or reminded of your last name everytime she watches UK play anytime soon. I hope you figure out that fine balance between wanting a girlfriend and being haunted by your woman-loving ex-wife. Don't worry, next time I will be sure not to confuse Potential with Promise. I used to find you charming. Now I find you pathetic. Hat's off to you, Mr. Potential. You played a good game.

By the way, I do have your number and no, no..I won't be calling.

Cheers.

1 comment:

KJ said...

Good for you. You spoke your mind and hopefully it will allow some man to get a clue. Don't give up!!!!