In Memoriam

Mary Irene

October 29, 1930 - November 8, 2006

My grandmother, and my good friend died last Wednesday. I was able to pay tribute to her by delivering part of her eulogy at her funeral on Saturday. In order for me to pay tribute to her to the rest of the world, I have posted the eulogy below...To Vee, NB-C, SEDW, Julia, and He :: thank you for your love and support and your words, know that I appreciated it very much ...

Good morning, my name is Natalie and I am proud to have otherwise been known as Mary’s granddaughter.

My grandmother was something to everyone sitting here today. Her true zest for life was undeniable, and infectious. To some she was a friend, to others a teacher. To us, she was a mother, and a grandmother. And maybe what she was best of all - she was a wife.

We come here together today to say goodbye. But this is not a sad day. No, let us not be mistaken for today is a cause for celebration in the life of a woman who became so much to all who had the pleasure to know – and love her.

I wonder if it were possible to measure the success of someone’s life at the occasion of their death. Would you measure it by what they had accomplished? By their devotion to their family? Would you measure it in the number of tears that had been shed, or the sound of laughter along the way? Or would you measure it in the memories – and the countless stories retold from the people who loved them.

The true success of our Mary, was found in all of that.

Our Mary knew us all beyond what we could even ourselves sometimes see.

I don’t think for my whole life or for my life to come that there was ever a better judge of character. She was someone who knew you before you knew yourself – and loved you all the while. And if your name didn’t fit, she would give you a good strong nickname. The strongest of those:

Christopher Robin. Brown Thing. Markus Aurelius. Ta Ta Tee Ta.

Our Mary believed in us and was proud of us, every single day.

There wasn’t a time I spent with her when she wouldn’t tell of an accomplishment of one of her grandchildren – each time I would visit she would tell me about one of my cousins and what they had been doing. She would smile and she would boast about these wonderful grandkids of hers – rightfully so. May you be sure that you always know how proud of you she was. And when she wasn’t there with you, she was always there in spirit.

Our Mary was every day, a teacher.

She believed in her students, whether in the classroom or at the dining room table. She understood how to make you understand or how to make you love to learn. How to never be afraid to try or how to give a clever name to an art project gone ary. She was especially gifted at how to bring people out of their shell and make them soar. Yes, she was a teacher of the highest caliber.

She was a wife who loved her husband beyond the boundaries of the earth and sky. A wife who lifted her husband up when he needed lifting. The mother of four children I happen to think are pretty great. A true partner.

A best friend for 56-years.

And in so many ways she was so much more – she was a storyteller, a prankster, a healer, an artist, a shopper, a believer, a coach, a student, an intuitionist, a singer, a name giver, a fashionista, and boy was she classy.

To me, my grandmother was everything and everyone I hope to one day be. She was everything that was good and right. She just got me. She fulfilled every promise she ever made to me. Loved me like she pledged to love me. Lifted me up higher than I deserved to be lifted. My grandmother believed in me, always.

And at a very early age she passed something on to me that I like to think of as our great bond...A true love for THIS family. A gift for which I am eternally grateful. It’s the tie that binds…

My grandmother was my heart. I am sure of it, for I am quite sure of the way it has broken.

She was our hearts.

And so it goes … Twenty nine years, eleven months, and two days I had with her. What we share now is a common thread all the stronger - the memories we have of our Mary. Memories that remind us of the life she gave us…that life of the most extraordinary kind…

A life filled with lots of love and a bounty full of laughter...

In closing, I’d like to read a poem that I believe may just give us pause as we remember our wife, our mother, our grandmother, our teacher, and our friend:

To Mary - John Clare ::

I sleep with thee, and wake with thee, And yet thou art not there; I fill my arms with thoughts of thee, And press the common air. Thy eyes are gazing upon mine, When thou art out of sight; My lips are always touching thine, At morning, noon, and night.

I think and speak of other things, To keep my mind at rest: But still to thee my memory clings, Like love in woman's breast. I hide it from the world's wide eye, And think and speak contrary; But soft the wind comes from the sky, And whispers tales of Mary.

The night wind whispers in my ear, The moons shines in my face; A burden still of chilling fear I find in every place. The breeze is whispering in the bush, And the dews fall from the tree, All sighing on, and will not hush, Some pleasant tales of thee.

Keep singing Gumball.