I am stuck inside my own head again and there is too much noise. There is just this noise that doesn't stop. Inside my head there is too much going on. Constant sound.
Echos :: I've Been Here Before, Haven't I? Must Have Done Something Wrong. Must Have Crossed the Line. It Wasn't Me. Wasn't Expecting You. Just Enough Damage.
Conversations :: New. Fade into Old. Just Words. Too Many Games. Next.
Words :: #2. Cannonball. Bryan Ferry. Clem & Joel. Viola & Will. Sad. Starcrossed.
Love :: Don't Want To. Can't Wait.
Sadness :: Stop.
Freedom !! My Own Space. Ex-husband. No Children (tick tock). Wonder Dog.
Hope :: Alone. OK. Content?
Move Forward. Move Backward.
Dwell on the Past. Dwell on the Present. Dwell on the Future.
In my head it goes onandonandonandon.
The sound drowns out logic. Throws away conventional wisdom. Defies my instinct. It makes me weak. It makes me doubt. It breaks me down.
This infurates me. I don't do "sad." I'm not weak. I had it all figured out two months ago. Two months ago I was in control.
Now there is just noise.
1 comment:
I've so been there and I have to say, the noise never really goes away (Repeat after me- noise is good, noise is good) It's simply replaced and re-organized. I'm a CONTROL freak, that's where the organization comes in. It's okay to let go of "control" for a while as long as your the one deciding!:) But for now, at least you have FABULOUS hair!!
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