Soap Box

Is it wrong that what I find so terribly heinous about this country is that with all of the issues we face nationally, let alone the perception of this country internationally, that the most important story our media can find the time to cover is Paris Hilton's impending jail time?

May I state, that I do not care if there are 22-days left until she heads the pokey. May I state, that she spelled "sign" like a 5-year old on her website, pleading her legions of fans to "sihn" a petition for reversing these charges. And we care, why? Can I just say.

OMG.

I AM SOOOOOOO over this.

Tell me more about how we should be driving Hybrid cars. Or reducing our overall consumption of our natural resources. Tell me how I can realistically pay $4.00 a gallon for gas this summer, or if there are companies expanding the use of bio-fuel to combat this problem. Please tell me how we manage to impeach a president for his personal, not professional, actions but do nothing about a president who basically tells this nation to F off on a daily basis by acting soley on his own agenda and not that of the millions of Americans who pay his salary. I wonder if the parents of the soldiers in Iraq have a problem with the fact that their sons and daughters are over there fighting, seeing unimaginable things, and all we have to talk about is a freaking socialite's driving on a suspended license. Where are our priorities? When did we stop being civic minded, and start getting so caught up on total crap. It's mindless fodder. It's trash.

And although I love me some celebrity gossip, there is a time and a place where it belongs. Contained to 30-minutes during Extra. 6 blog pages at a time on perezhilton.com. But not on the front page of the newspaper. Not on CNN, MSNBC, or even that blasphemous FOX News. There is so much happening in this country, in this world that is so much more worthy of our time and attention than how poor Miss Paris will fare, or not fare, in the slammer.

Somehow there are no words

I keep trying to write, something. But I can't. I can't find the words. Or formulate a logical thought. I've been second guessing a lot. And crying over everything. I am so overwhelmed by emotion, both happy and sad that it just feels like everyone is talking and nothing makes sense anymore. I feel an incredible amount of loss this past week and a few days. I have lost all things familiar, all that is no longer mine.

I lost my best friend, because of words that were too easily said and not heartfelt when they counted the most. I lost the contentment I had comfortably held from a distance, the hope, the dream, no longer to be shared. Today, trusted my instinct and learned that after a year and a half the one who calls me his best friend, still holds my friendship at an awkward distance. I silently recounted an anniversary, that should have six years later meant something more. Walked away from the job that felt more like home to me than anything else in this town. Opened the door to a bright future. Threw away pictures from my wedding, honeymoon, from the first love, from the old friends whose faces I no longer knew. I threw away my wedding dress, veil, shoes, and everything else associated with it (sorry, mom). I held higher expectations than I should have.

From. Everyone. Who. Meant. Anything. To. Me.

If ever there were time for a change to happen, I am convinced that right now is that time. As scared as I am to go, I almost feel a sense of relief. It is as if I am being smothered by every mistake, every ounce of trust, every memory good and bad, day in and day out. Bittersweet, it seems I have never felt more alive and more alone than I do right now. And for the relationship side of this I have no one but myself to blame. I have trusted and believed longer and more than I should have. I have opened my heart and re-opened old wounds. I have not been a friend to the one person I never wanted to lose, hurt, or let go of. I cry all the time, as if to say to myself: Enough.

And so I wait for the days to wash over me and the solace to once again come. I dream of the day where life begins again and the hurt and the sadness goes away as quickly as it came. I forgive myself for my mistakes, and I try coming to terms with those who I must let go of, and I know that there is much ahead...and that comforts me. But I still can't help but wonder how I have landed in such a time of change or why everything that has been anything to me is coming to an end, within days of each other. I still can't help but wonder what kind of restitution I am being forced to pay or if the person I thought I was, isn't really me at all. There must be some kind of explanation. There must be some bigger reason why the one person I want to see me off on my journey won't be there to say goodbye. Some reason that the dream I used to believe in wasn't quite real enough to stay in. There must be some reason that he still can't be honest with me. There must be some validity in my decision to move forward. So much so, that it was easy for me to say "time to go." I keep waiting for the epiphany to come. I keep looking within, trying to find the answer to the question I keep asking myself: What is it about me, that makes me, so easy to let go of...

Because it seems everyone, including me...is.

Though It's Not Easy To Tell You Goodbye...

I resigned this morning from the company I have called home for the last five and a half years. I'm moving to Reston, Virginia at the end of the month.

Breaking away.

Finally.

On to new challenges. New faces. New hopes, fears, and dreams. Far from the memory of the people I have loved, lost, hurt, and those who have hurt me. Far from the memory of the husband formerly known as mine and the life I settled for. Away from countless people who have become my friends over the last 14-years in LexVegas. A hard place to leave, but to a new world of possibility ahead.

For the first time I'm doing something significant and taking control over my future - and knowingly doing so. Acting, instead of talking. Taking charge instead of it taking charge of me. This is a good thing. And I'm ready to go...

I'm ready to move forward with my own life instead of the lives of others. I'm ready to forget the ghosts of the past, the daily reminders of the men who have broken my heart, and those who broke my spirit. Ready to break away from the memories of those who almost loved me enough...

Tomorrow would have been 6 years to the day that I married the husband formerly known as mine. To say that the journey has been long is an understatement. But it's gotten me here.

And here, I go.

Leavin on a Jet Plane

Going to Beantown today, until Thursday. Yep, it's one of the biggest storms of the season hitting the Northeast and I'm headed right to it. Awesome.

I'll be heading to the greater DC area on Friday through Monday, so this is an offical hiatus.

See ya upon my return.

Seems Very Appropriate Today

I don't typically, but curiously checked my horoscope, and this is what it had to say:

Dear Natalie,

Here is your horoscope for Tuesday, April 10:

All this success is exciting, but it might also feel a little overwhelming. Give yourself quiet time so you can review everything that's happened. You've got all the opportunities in the world, so make the most of them.


Appropriate seeing as I'm headed to No. VA for a second interview next Friday. I believe I said to NB-C today how fast it all seems to be happening. Intresting, seeing as I've firmly committed to rolling my arse out of the Bluegrass for the life and opportunities I should have moved to eight years ago. I guess everything happens all in due time. Some just arrive later than others.


More soon...

Tagged

Thanks, Kate...

I'm supposed to give you seven songs that are currently on repeat for me right now. Seeing as I always listen to the same CD's, my "what's hip" really isn't too hip. As NB-C says, I listen to whiny shit. She's right. If it ain't slow & low, sad & melancholy it's probably not playing in my car...and seeing as I still don't have an Ipod, Phillips, or other MP3 player, I am really uncool.

So here goes:

Irreplaceable by Beyonce: Ever since my week in Belgium where it was played overandoverandover I can't help it, I crank this song up and sing it, loud. It's a good anthem for me, even though not really applicable at present time. I agree with Kate, as a single gal, you can't really help but love the lyrics. I sooooo want to sing this to the husband-formerly-known-as-mine.

Say It Right by Nelly Furtado: Something about that song is just sexy. It's kinda mellow, kinda fun, but I dig this tune. It makes me want to get my swerve on. "From my hands I could give you, Something that I made, From my mouth I could sing you another brick that I laid, From my body I could show you a place God knows, You should know the space is holy, Do you really want to go?" I just love it.

Last Request by Paolo Nutini: Current anthem of yours truly. Shocking. Anywho, as I have mentioned before I am in love with this fabulous 19-year old Scottish lad. Dude is freakin' hot. I mean, smokin' hot. Fabulous, perfect lips. Amazing eyes. HOT. See for yourself...And besides that, I really love the words. And oh, how I would love to go nowhere with him...



Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol: "All that I am, all that I ever was, is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see. I don't know where, confused about how as well, just know these things will never change for us at all." OOOOH it gets me every time.

Glamourous by Fergie: So I don't have this tune on CD, but I see it all the time on VH-1 and there is something special in the way she says "flouncy, flouncy" because really, isn't flouncy an under-used word? One can never have too much flounce. I wonder if I'm flouncy?

Say Hello, Wave Goodbye by David Gray: I adore this song. I had forgotten it, and came across it by chance a couple months ago and now I think I listen to it daily. It's relevant only to one person over the last 1.5 years, ahem, yeah that one. "You and I had to be the standing joke of the year...It was a kind of so, so love and I'm goin' to make sure it doesn't happen again...take a look at my face, for the last time. I never knew you, you never knew me, say hello - goodbye." Yep. If only I c/would say goodbye...

Broken Hearted Savior by Big Head Todd & The Monsters: Old school. Recently came back into my mix. Takes me back someplace special. It's like a long spring drive on Old Frankfort Pike, with the sunroof open, the sun comeing down and making you warm, wind blowing in your hair. It's familiar. It's happy. It makes you remember a different place and time, and it makes you want to sing.

....So tag, you're all it. I think there are about 6 people reading this blog and you know who you are. Give me some new music - I need to live vicariously through you...

I Hate You Florida

Please, for the love of all that's good and holy...

Don't choke dear, Buckeyes.

We've been through this road once before, say, in January. Our glorious football season smashed into a million pieces when you got your asses handed to you by those despicable Florida Gators. You remember, right? Yeah, it was the biggest game of the season (okay, second biggest because after all you did beat the team Up North) yep, it was the game you forgot to show up for. Remember? Let me jog your memory...It all started out so well, a touchdown in the first 15-seconds of the game. Jay and I in our scarlet and grey, high-fiving each other and celebrating what was sure to be a spectacular night. Rubbing it in the face of that Florida fan, BJ, who dared to watch it with us. And then, just like that. It slipped through our fingers, more quickly than it ever began. We were the fools. You thought you had it in the bag, and you choked. You forgot your sea of fans, your minions who stood by you through that perfect season. And you let it come down to 60-minutes of a half rate performance. Booooo. Boooooooooo.

So, even though I am not a loyal, die-hard, OSU basketball fan, I will stand by you (of course!) tonight as you go for another National Championship game with the freaking Florida Gators. I mean, how is it possible that it's us and them all over again...Please, I beg of you, don't choke. Show up this time. Don't make us their bitches for a whole year.

And anyway, I'm just counting down the next 14-hours so that whoever ends up winning, it will be just a matter of time before Billy D announces what we all hope is true...That he's coming to the Bluegrass to whip our UK boys into shape and into the Big Dance - this time for the greatest basketball program in the United States - University of Kentucky BABY!!!!

Just A Little Update

So you know, I haven't like sliced my wrists or taken on that weird self mutilation thing this week. I haven't even had a cocktail, or a smoke for that matter. I think I might be doing a weeeeeeee bit better, in fact.

Misery loves company, and NB-C and I make a fine pair, so we've been raging our own little battle against the world this week and I believe it has been a great source of therapy, yes indeed. You got a problem? We'll hash it out and we'll tell you why it is you are stupid and how we would do it different. You got an issue with your boss? We'll laugh at their misery and stupidness. We'll probably burn in hell for that too...bygones. You wanna rain on our fuckoffyoustupidselfishbastard parade and we'll tell you where to go and how to get there.

It's been awesome.

Theraputic.

Plus, I think I've (FINALLY) decided to make the Northern VA/DC move. I'm about 90% sure, and a 25-minute talk with a potential employer in said region this week might have solidified my thinking. I'll keep you posted on that, although, I'm not sure it's a good idea to make life altering decisions in my current state of malaise. I'm also about to post something that is probably not a good idea, but who cares. Nothing I do is ever much of a good-in-hindsight-idea. But it's a work of sheer genius and really shouldn't be left to rot in the Microsoft Word cyberworld.

Stay tuned.

PS: SEDW it was great seeing you and the boy (and you too you super sassy, Sally Jo) on Monday & Tuesday. Thanks for listening, and thanks for grounding me...I haven't shed a tear since...I think I needed to acknowledge (admit?) exactly what it was I felt. Thanks for always understanding me, and for believing in the (im)possible with the same starry eyes as me. I love you !!!

Melancholy & The Infinite Sadness

I'm in a funk.

Not one of those "Nat's totally lost it, again" kind of funks, but the kind where an inexplicable sadness has fallen over me. I just feel sad, like I've lost my way. The kind of melancholy where I want to change everything. Where I can't run from the sadness because I know it will follow, but where I want to pack up everything and head for somewhere new. Somewhere totally illogical like a small New England town, where I could just get lost in the obscurity. It's a good thing my hair chick is on maternity leave, cause I'd probably cut my hair off and dye it purple if she weren't. It's the kind of sadness you feel for no real reason, or maybe there is a reason, it's just that it is beyond my control. It is the kind where at any point in the day tears will come to my eyes, big ones. The aligator tears. Where a knot wells up in the pit of my stomach and hurts. It's the kind of sadness where you have deja vu in the Atlanta airport, because it's Sunday, and you remember all the trips that have come to an end over the last couple months - how you've found yourself in that airport, once again, on another Sunday, like a lost soul always waiting to come home.

NB-C and I were commenting last Wednesday how this has been such a weird year so far. How it's been full of ups and downs. Highs and lows. Excitement and devastation. When it's been good, it's been great. We've had a lot to be thankful for - a lot that's gone in our favor. But when it's turned around it's been like a stab through the heart. More than we can bear. The age old irony of the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. Life's gentle reminders of just how close we come to attaining the things we want most in life, almost like being taunted and teased with them, being so close before they are all too quickly pulled from our grasp.


Just close enough to make you need it...

Just close enough to make you want it more than you ever thought you would...

Just close enough to believe...

Just close enough to make it hurt like hell...

Just close enough to make you fall...


Hard.

Wherever You Go, There You Are

Spinning.

I feel like I am spinning.

My head, my heart, my whole body seems to be moving right now and my mind, perhaps that is what is spinning most of all.

************************************************************

I returned last night to Lexington after my literal world tour. I have had to continually remind myself that today is Tuesday, that it's the 20th of March, and that I'm in Lexington, Kentucky. I have never quite had the sensation I have today - of this time and day warp that I've been in - for the past twelve days.

My body hates me. It's still swaying with the ebb and flow of the water, so much so that it is hard to type, walk, or focus on any one object for long. It's making me ill. I'm so tired that I can barely think, or keep my eyes from crying, or concentrate on any task for very long. My clothes are tight from too many days of over indulgence, thousands of calories wasted on food and drink. My liver is pissed and has no desire to consume alcohol for quite awhile. My lungs are sore, my cough will not go away, and I have now officially only had one cigarette since last Wednesday night.

I am a weary traveller. I am worn down. I am worn out. I want to process the events of the last 12 days. I want to ponder the places, the people, and the events from each adventure. I want to finally take time to think about Paris, instead of being forced to quickly move away from its grasp. I want my day to have it's routine back. I want to see my dog. I want to be in my bed. I Want. To. Just. Be.

Be away from every place I've been.

I want to be home.

****************************************************************

I am grateful for my good fortune to be such a traveller, but I am reminded today of just what a toll it can take on you. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. The toll has indeed been taken. And yet, I will have to turn around and go back out on another journey in only 3 short days. Back to Ft. Lauderdale. Where I spent four hours yesterday waiting to come home. This trip, a wedding. Wedding of my oldest friend and the closest to a brother I have, Kevin. It will be interesting to see how my wedding anxiety disorder (WAD) and my weary traveller syndrome mix with one another. I'll probably sprout horns and turn into the devil. That is, if I haven't already.

I sure hope the motion sickness stops by then.

****************************************************************

I'll update you on the recent misadventures of the big pimp Natty later...

...When everything stops spinning.

Hey You

Today's horoscope: Be careful of advertising yourself as someone who is so strong and mentally competent that you are capable of handling everything, dear Sagittarius. Take note that the strongest mule on the trail usually ends up carrying the most weight. Your emotions are more sensitive than you may think, and certainly more sensitive than you demonstrate to others. Be honest about the way you feel, and not just the way you think.

You called about an hour ago saying you have arrived and I'm stuck in a sweltering office with nothing to do and no way to leave. Is it possible we are only minutes apart, we are 5,999 of the 6,000 miles, and yet I still can't see your face? As my Parisian friends would say "this is a probleme."

Indeed. Times wasting right in front of us and I'm trapped and powerless to do anything about it...story of my life, right? Patience. I must have patience. But its hard to have that when your eyes and all that is behind them are just around the corner...

Thank you for coming to Paris today, I hope we share much laughter and many memories until the time comes to say goodbye again...And if by chance I happen to forget to tell you when that dreaded time comes, I already miss you my friend.

Right at this moment, I think, more than ever.

Until Then...

So. I've been a kinda crappy Blogger these days.

Sue me.

I'm off to one of my most favorite cities, and X officially now marks the spot on what is sure to be a whirlwind I like to refer to as the rest of March.

Paris.
Atlanta. (Let's hope we'll see the beloved Paolo Nutini there to make that city worthwhile)
Key West.
Cozumel.
Ft. Lauderdale.

Seems logical to think that when I return spring should be rearing it's beautiful head, sandals should be the safe choice, and that pretty toes! are officially a new sporting event in this girls life. I wish I could take all your poor suckers on this trip, but alas. I can only bring along two for the ride. And this time, I choose the fabulous brown eyed Belgian to accompany me in Paris. And the fabulous Ms. Vee to accompany me to Key West & Cozumel. Yay.

I'm going to be so bored come April. I know. Poor Me. Boo Hoo.

Kidding.

Anywhooooo, I shall find some time to update you on my (mis)adventures once on the road. Pray I don't have to go to any Parisian police stations in the same car as the villian on this trip (been there, done that). Pray I don't get thrown overboard, sea sick, or overwhelmed by the desire to talk like a pirate and yell "Ahoy Matey!" at every chance I get...

So next time, from the road...

Cheers, friends.

Yeah, It Really Freaking Sucks.

www.storypeople.com / Riding Home

Observations for a Wednesday

• Tell me why it's newsworthy on MSN's Entertainment section to inform us that Paris Hilton has been pulled over for a speeding ticket. Guess what! I. Don't. Care. Now, if she had done something rivoting, perhaps. But seriously. There has to be something better to note than this.
• I keep smelling something in the air that smells like a dirty ashtray. For like 36-hours now. I bathe, I try to not smoke that much. I know that it can't be me. WTF.
• How do hotels get away with charging $43 for a plated lunch? Isn't that like, extortion or something?
• Why is it when you try to fly from LexVegas to Beantown, the only times available are either 5:00 a.m., or 10:00 p.m.?
• Do I dress horribly everyday, cause seriously, today I've had half of my office tell me how awesome I look, I think cause I'm wearing a dress, and it's so nice and all but I'm starting to get a complex for every other day that I apparently look like a slob.
• Why is it the day you get paid, your money is gone before you can touch it?
• How come the realtors in the office next to ours never wash their hands when they are done using the restroom?
• Tell me why my neighbors feel the need to lock the entrance to our apartment building even though they know I don't have a key that unlocks that door? And oh, I'm the only one who doesn't have their own private entrance??? Assholes.
• Is it really possible that I tried buying a pair of brown sandals last night, or even red ones, but ended up with my staple black instead?
• Why is it people in shitty relationships with no clear future, stay in said relationship just cause it's easier than being alone. (Myself included, past tense)
• Why do said persons feel the need to repeatedly question such decisions (myself included, past tense) instead of just making them?
• Is it spring yet? Can I wear sandals yet? Please?
• Leave for Paris a week from today? Mais, oui. Excited? Uh, yeah. Out of my freakin' mind...
• Is it me or does American Idol kinda suck this season? The little Marvin Gaye guy from last night is pretty hot though. I find myself b-o-r-e-d for the rest of it.
• I worked really hard for about 3 hours today and knocked out a lot of stuff and now I'm bored. And going to the gym...

Happy Hump Day Ya'll...

Hmmmmmm.....

Not sure where I've been the last week and a half, but it sure hasn't been on Blogger.

Bygones.

Might as well catch up now...

I'm settling in to watch the Oscars and I'll probably make it till about 10:45 before I fall asleep, because like clock work, I do it every year. Right. Before. They. Announce. The. Good. One. My vote is going to the fabulous "Little Miss Sunshine" for best picture. I adore that flick. But then again, I think the only other film I've seen is "The Departed" and I loved that too, but more in a graphically violent sort of way. Can't wait until I catch up on all these movies on Netflix. Can I just say that Ryan Secrest is annoying and should be banned from pre-Oscar red carpet reporting. I can't bring myself to listen to Joan & Melissa Rivers so I'll just shut up now.

Went to the 'Nati yesterday to visit Slimy and Joey. Hello, please just take a look at His Royal Cuteness...

This is Joey right after waking up from a nap. Hello! Have you ever seen ANYONE be that jovial after a nap? He's sure got his grouchy aunt Nat beat. I hadn't seen Joey since he was about ten days old, but I fell back in love with him the second I saw him again. Had a great time with his momma and daddy too - although it never ceases to amaze me how much Slimy and I have grown up since our first days of friendship in 1989...


In other rousing misadventures...


Finally got my nappy roots highlighted again. It's only been since the end of November. The ewwwww factor was at an all time high. Give me a break. Our fabulous hair chick is on maternity leave and as for any other excuses, unfortunately, I don't have any.

Finally cleaned my nasty apartment. Really cleaned it. Mopped and everything. It's only been since like October since I last mopped. Feelin' pretty happy about that. It's not at perfect clean status, but I'd rate it an 8 out of 10. I kinda want to move out of the Hobbit House. But seeing as I'm not sure where I want to land, I should probably just clean more often. And throw out a lot of stuff I don't need/use/wear anymore to give me some more space.


Finally went to Gulfport after a year long abscence. Had a great time with NB-C & Vee. Behaved very well at Mardi Gras. Survived crowd phobia and germ phobia quite well, I must say.


I'm sucked into the MTV's "The Hills." There is something strange in knowing how different LA girls are from those of us on the Eastern half of the country. For some reason, I really dig that show. It's kinda like the crack for this middle aged GAP-wearing-chick. I think I find myself fantasizing about having that blonde of hair, working for Teen Vogue, wearing designer clothing, eating out every night, and then hitting the hottest club with boys named Brody. Why? Because it's so not like me.


If you haven't had a listen to Paolo Nutini, you really should. A friend of mine turned me on to him a few months back and I am officially head over heels for his music. Good news is, looks like English Andy and I will get to go to a concert of his in Atlanta the night before leaving for the cruise. He's freaking HOT. Paolo that is. But he's only 19, so it's a little like being Mrs. Robinson.


I've been trying to brush up on my French a little. You would think that 8-years of French would enable you to have some ability to speak it or conjugate sentences with all those words that you can still retain. But no. So far, I should be able to explain to customs why I'll be in Paris.

"Je suis ici en voyage d'affaires pour quelques jours et aussi visite à mon ami, le Belge. Oui, j'adore le Belge!"



Yep. I really need a new change of scenery.

To All My Valentines

I was thinking tonight about how much difference a year makes when it comes to Valentine's day. I loathe this holiday, really. I always have. It seems sort of pointless to have to designate a day to tell people how you feel about them. Shouldn't Valentine's day be everyday? Do we really need a holiday to remind us to buy gifts, go to restaurants, or send cards? Last year, I was like the angry chick stuck in a circle of "what if" hell. This year, I really couldn't care less. I don't need the reassurance this year to know, to feel, that I have lots of Valentines out there, who give me love day in and day out, and not only on one day a year. That makes me happy, just to know that.

So to all my Valentines - my friends, near and far, may you know how much I love you and cherish you, and thank you for the blessings you bring to my life. It is my hope that even when I don't tell you, you always know that I am appreciative for all the moments we share.

To each of you who share my journey, to my truest of true, year in and year out, Valentines...

May you know that I miss you not being in Lexington, Trev. May you know, JAB, how glad I am that we are coming to know each other again. May you know, Jules, that the memories we've had together are some of the most favorite of my life. May you know that I will always think you are beautiful, Slimy. May you know, Beek, how my heart is full because of you. May you know, Mr. Penny, that I'm still thankful for the laughter we share. May you know, SEDW, that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't wish we could be together to talk for hours as if they were only minutes. May you know, Belgian, that our friendship and our souls likeness will leave me forever changed. May you know, NB-C, how thankful I am that my family only lives two miles away, and that my wedding dress resides, perpetually, in your basement. May you know, Vee, that there isn't a day I don't wish you were on the other couch watching movies with me, or smoking and drinking red wine with me, here. May you know that your sons and daughters smiles warm my soul, and that I can't wait to know all of the children yet to come. May each of you know that our goodbyes always break my heart because of the love I have for our friendship.

You are all my Valentines.

Not just on this day.

But on every day.

Paris je t'aime !

It's a good thing I do love it. I'm headed there in three and a half weeks...tee hee...My passport was a bit lonely with that one measely stamp in it.

Although it will be a short trip (4-days), I won't be at a loss. In fact, it'll be about 12 days before I return to the bright & sunny LexVegas from start to finish. Paris, Atlanta, Key West, Cozumel...Yep. I'll stop now...

OH! Not to mention, NB-C and I are headed to see Vee this weekend in the big Gulfport. NB-C hasn't seen the post Hurricane Katrina death and destruction before so that should be neat. We're also headed to that nasty ass New Orleans for a little Mardi Gras fun...have I ever mentioned that I am deathly afraid of crowds, crowded places, being trapped, feeling unsafe, or GERMS. Yep. We're headed to the epicenter of all those things. Sweet. But what can I say, being anywhere with those two for a few days is sure to be a blast.

Some years, like this one, it's good to be me. Let's hope 2007 keeps the blessings alive. I've got to say, I'm liking how it has started...

Vindication

Thank you, Grammy voters for giving props to the album and song, Country, Pop, or otherwise that deserved to have top honors this year.

Thank you, Grammy voters for listening to the words, to the melody behind them, and the heartfelt outpouring of the music.

Thank you, Grammy voters for standing up for what was deserved, not what was convienently and politically correct.

Thank you, Dixie Chicks for not just shutting up and singing. For having a voice. For excercising your freedom as American citizen. For pushing the boundaries. For singing loudly, and for being proud.

Thank you, for giving me an anthem over the last year. For enabling me and NB-C to sing loudly in my car, and to feel passionately about it when we do.

Every time, we do.

This chick is and always will be, proud to be called your fan.

Is It Weird That I Find This Tragic?

In case you've missed the news in the last 24-hours: read here.

We really should be ashamed of ourselves.

When is the American public's quest for more, finally going to be enough? Sometimes I think we forget that celebrities are human beings, too. Sometimes I think we should get more interesting hobbies than caring what the B-listers are up to, or how far we push until their humanity becomes nothing more than fodder for late night TV.

Sad.